The decision to get divorced is never an easy one. It takes time, stress, fights and lots and lots of tears. One of the most heart wrenching parts of a divorce is thinking about the children involved. Their worlds will change, and their hearts may be broken because of the separation that is about to occur. Regardless of how you are feeling, as a parent, it is your responsibility to ensure that, in the end, your child or children will be okay. Avoiding divorce in the first place may bring them joy, however, if the marriage is at a place where it becomes unhealthy for both parties involved, your children may be happier with you being apart. They won’t have to cover their ears tightly due to all the screaming, they won’t have to sit through tension at the dining table, and they’ll be able to enjoy parents who rather than arguing together all day, are happier and funnier apart.
Explaining things helps.
Your children may not know that you are headed towards Divorce Lawyer. However, they are aware that something is wrong. They are not deaf to the screaming or blind to the frowning faces. It is important that both parents take the time out of being at each other’s throats to explain things to the children.
Apart of explaining involves letting them know that they are not the reason that you are getting divorce. Children will often blame them, and this is something you do not want to affect your child, not in the short term or the long term. Be honest with them and allow them to understand that you and your partner cannot come to terms on important things, and have decided to part so that they are able to grow in a healthier environment.
Fill them in on why you are separated. For older children, they may want to know what the cause of the divorce is. Honesty is important and will give them closure. This doesn’t mean that you have to go into details. Use your judgment and determine whether or not you think your child would be okay hearing what the root of the problem is. If you don’t think it would be appropriate to tell them, then explain this to them.
Let them know that you love them and that you will never stop loving them. Remind them of this, each and every day. At times, in all the stress of divorce, people tend to forget the most delicate souls, the children. Make it a point to take a second out of each day to say the words, ‘I love you.’
Don’t let them choose. It’s difficult for children coming to terms with the fact that one of their parents won’t be living in their home anymore. Ultimately, the court will decide which parent gets custody of the child or children. Putting your children in a situation where they have to weigh their love and affection, spare feelings and decide on which parent they want to live with, should not be a burden that they have to bare.
Don’t allow them to feel as though a divorce means that they have lost one parent. Once the decision is made as to who the child or children will be living with, allow them to understand that the other parent will be present in their lives and will always be there for them no matter what.
If you are going through a divorce and in need of legal assistance and support, contactPlatinum Lawyers. They have lawyers who specialize in the many areas of law, including family law. For more details (02) 8084 2764